They cut it all off. All of it. My hair is so short now. It’s the most liberating thing I have ever done. It felt so wild and spur of the moment to just go in to the barber shop and say, “Cut it off, cut it all off.” I feel like a new man. It’s perfect. I don’t think I’ve ever seen such startled looks on the faces of my acquaintances. They had always told me I looked great with long hair, that having a pony tail hanging between my shoulder blades was “Cool.” “Dean,” they would say, “I just love your long hair. It looks great on you.” Well, no more. It’s short and I like it that way.


I was outside the barber shop, leaning against the pole that those stupid candy stripe things are on. The smoke and the noise from the city really didn’t bother me that much. Every once and a while I’d shake my head and watch as the little snipped hairs would float to the ground, like little shards of my former life. I’d bring my head up quick to look and see if anyone was watching me. But nobody was. They were too caught up in their own lives to worry about good ol’ Dean.
I was getting quite bored so I decided to leave my post outside the barber shop and head to a coffee shop. As I walked down the street I decided to make a change and find somewhere new. “What the hell,” I thought. “I feel like a new man. Why shouldn’t I try some new things?”
I walked back the way I had come from, passing the tiny barber shop wedged in between two department stores and looked for somewhere new to hangout. Somewhere where I could toast the beginning of my new life.
My search turned up nothing. I just couldn’t find anywhere to go. No where looked any good. Some places were too alternative, some were too conservative. And I sure as hell wasn’t going to go into a place playing that classical music. Not something I enjoy too much. So I headed back to my apartment.

* * *

I picked up my huge car from downtown and went back to my apartment. I really hated that car. It didn’t fit me at all. I resolved that I would get myself a new one, a smaller one, something a bit more sporty.
When I got in the door, my answering machine light was blinking. I walked over to it and hit play. There were a couple of hang ups and then a message from one of my acquaintances telling me about a party going on that night. I didn’t usually go to those because a lot of the people there are just loadies and burn-outs. I don’t even know why the people I know even went to them. Of course, I was wondering why I was hanging around with the same people. But I decided to go out on the edge. Take a chance. I picked up the phone and dialed. After a few rings, Geoff picked up.
“Hello?”
“Geoff? This is Dean. I decided I’m going to go to that party you left me the message about,” I said.
“Really?” Geoff asked, sounding surprised. “That’s great. It’s at Francis’s place. Starts at eight.”
“ Well then,” I said. “I’ll be there.”
I hung up the phone. Putting my jacket on I looked at my watch. It was three, so I had just enough time to go car shopping before meeting Lydia at five.

* * *

It was 4:30 before I found a car that I liked. It was a little red sports car with a convertible top. It was such a drastic change from the big boat that I had that I bought it right there. I got a pretty good trade in on the big car and paid the balance in cash.
I cruised out of the car lot with the top down, the wind blowing in my face. I drove ninety all the way to Greg’s Coffee House to see Lydia.
Lydia was already seated and sipping coffee when I arrived. I checked my watch and saw that it was only 4:50. Just like that girl to be early. That really bugged me because it makes me feel even worse when I’m late, which I usually am.
I strode in and sat down across from her. She looked up from her coffee and smiled. I just looked back at her.
“So, you got your hair cut. It looks…different. I mean, I like it, I think…” She let the last word trail off.
“I got a new car, too. A little red sports car,” I said to her.
“You got rid of the big boat? How could you? I love that car.”
I got real tired of her pratter and suddenly I didn’t want to be there, so I left. Didn’t even look at her. Just got up and walked out.

* * *

I showed up at Francis’s party at about 8:30. There were a lot of people there already. I walked in and had to wade my way through the bodies, looking for Francis or Geoff. I couldn’t find either of them.
I hung out at the party for about an hour, not really seeing anyone I knew. The booze was flowing freely and I was getting a buzz from all the secondary smoke I was breathing in. It seemed like an okay party. Then Lydia showed up.
“Dean?” she said as she walked over to me. “I didn’t know you were coming to this.”
“Well,” I said, “I was thinking about how I never come to these, and I decided to come.”
“That’s great,” she said. “I was wondering something. What possessed you to get up and leave me in Greg’s?”
“I don’t know,” I said. “I was getting bored so I left.”
“Thanks a lot,” she replied. “I’m glad I’m such wonderful company. You know Dean, you’ve changed a lot. I used to like you a lot, too. But you’ve done a 180 in the past day. I don’t even really know you anymore. You’ve changed your appearance, got a new car, and a new personality, too. A worse one at that. The old Dean never would’ve left me sitting alone at Greg’s.”
“You know what, Lydia? The old Dean is gone. This is the new Dean. He’s a new person so get used to it.” I was getting bored again so I left her standing there.

* * *

I bummed around the party for a while, still couldn’t find Francis or Geoff. I was just getting ready to leave when Lydia approached me again. From what I could tell she was baked out of her mind.
“Dean?” she said as she laid her hand on my arm.
“Yeah?”
“I want to, like, apologize for earlier. If I wasn’t so blasted right now I probably never would have had the courage to do this.”
“It’s okay, Lydia,” I said. No matter what I changed, I still did have a soft spot in my heart for her.
“Well, I was wondering, since your this new man and everything, If you’d like to show me just how new this man is. You’ve never taken me up on my offers before, so will the new Dean?”
I contemplated that. She was right. I never had accepted her offers before. But I was different now, changing all the time. What could it hurt? It really wouldn’t mean anything and she probably wouldn’t remember it tomorrow anyway.
Her hand had moved to the base of my neck and was lazily dragging across it. I looked down at her, her beautiful shoulder-length brown hair and brown eyes. That face that was like an angel’s. I could feel her breasts pressed against my chest, and when I murmured an agreement, I felt them stiffen against me. She took my hands and led me upstairs.

* * *

I lay in the darkness of the room, Lydia’s body draped across mine. I could hear her soft snores as I stared at the ceiling. All was peacefully quiet, except that the people in the next room got a little noisy every once and a while.
I thought back and smiled at the memory of the past few hours. Lydia may be a small woman, but her body responded in every way possible. It had truly been magic. Nothing had ever been better. I could’ve actually just gone back to sleep and been content with this. But I couldn’t.
I gingerly removed myself from Lydia’s embrace and put my clothes back on. I knelt down beside her and covered her naked, slumbering form with the sheet. I put my lips down on her forehead and lightly kissed her. She murmured something and curled up. I got up and walked out of the room.

* * *

When I got to my car, I put the top down and sped away from the curb. Instead of heading home, I turned onto the road leading up the side of the mountain. It was a beautiful night, and I wanted to contemplate a few things under the stars.
I drove up to Lookout Point. It was aptly named, due to its spectacular view of the city. I parked the car and got out. I looked over the city, and even imagined I could see Francis’s house. Thinking of that, my mind wandered back to the beautiful angel I had left there. But I quickly put her out of mind, I had other things to think about.
Lying on the hood of the car, I decided I needed a change, a major one. I had my mind made up. I got back in the car. The keys were in the ignition. I was getting too bored with this town. So I started the car, and drove it off the cliff.